NRA Wants To Overturn Ban On Concealed Weapons In National Parks

Proposal Spawns New Bumper Sticker: ‘If Guns Are Outlawed, Only Chipmunks Will Have Guns’

The always reasonable National Rifle Association wants to over turn a long-standing prohibition against carrying concealed weapons in a national park.

Responding to an outbreak of violence which saw a 300% increase in mugging incidents in national parks over the past five years from one to three, the NRA insists carrying concealed weapons will help millions of drunk camping enthusiasts enjoy the Great Outdoors more safely.

An NRA spokes-redneck was quoted as saying, “There’s plenty of precedent for carrying concealed weapons on federally-owned campgrounds. Yosemite Sam was named after a national park and he’s always had at least two revolvers and unlimited ammo.”

According to MSNBC:

“..David Yates, a gun-rights activist from Alexandria, Va., says he believes the current rule tramples the Second Amendment rights of all law-abiding Americans to bear arms. Yates, who usually carries a handgun for self-defense where legally allowed, has given up visiting national parks as ‘a point of honor and principle.’

‘I won’t go there because they make a political issue out of preventing somebody from defending themselves,’ Yates said.”

NRA supporters point out that Yates is exactly the kind of clear-thinking, well-balanced, non-reactionary type who should be free to open fire at the slightest provocation in a federally-mandated picnic area.

The NRA proposal is being opposed by environmentalists, liberal Democrats and campers without Kevlar sleeping bags.

In a related story, the NRA has brought suit in Federal court for the right of dues-paying members to bring a bazooka into their local YMCA.

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If God didn’t want guns in national parks, he wouldn’t have given Yosemite Sam guns…
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