The Peter Griffin Rap

Haven’t you just been LONGING to know the lyrics of the Peter Griffin Rap?

>>>blank looks at Wendy….crickets chirping….general confusion<<<

Then today is your lucky day. Here are the lyrics, in full, of the Peter Griffin Rap. You’ll probably want to memorize these and quote them at the next big family gathering. You know, to really make Auntie Wilma proud and all.

“Just like the bad guy from Lethal Weapon 2
I’ve got diplomatic immunity, so Hammer cannot sue
I can write graffiti, even jaywalk in the street
I can riot, loot, not give a hoot, and touch your sister’s teat
Can’t touch me!

Stop! It’s Peter time
I’m a big shot, there’s no doubt
Light a fire then pee it out
Don’t like it, kiss my rump
For a second, let’s all do the bump
Can’t touch me!
Yea do the Peter Griffin Bump
Can’t touch me!

I’m Presidential Peter
Interns think I’m hot
Don’t care if your handicapped
I’ll still park in your spot
I’ve been around the world
>From Hartford to Backbay
It’s Peter, go Peter, MC Peter, yo Peter
Let’s see Regis rap this way
Can’t touch me!

(spoken) Except you, you can touch me.”

Ahhh. Nothing like a well-written, raunchy, politically incorrect song from Peter to get the day going right again.