Adam West is my hero

Mayor Adam West: I just bought a Rottweiler, and I need a sign to warn people how dangerous it is.
Home Supply clerk (pointing to “BEWARE OF DOG” sign): Well, we have exactly what you–
Mayor Adam West: Ah, yes, here it is: “ONE WAY.” So people will know if they step into my yard, there’s only one way out–in a body bag from dog injuries.

(Adam West is marrying his hand)
Priest: If anyone has any reason as to why this marriage should not take place, speak now or forever hold your peace.
(Adam West’s other hand raises up)
Adam West: Shut up, you had your chance!

Trisha Takinawa: Here comes Mayor Adam West himself. Mr. West, do you have any words for our viewers?
Mayor Adam West: Box, toaster, aluminum, maple syrup… no I take that one back. I’m gonna hold onto that one.

Doctor: Mayor West, you have Lymphoma.
Mayor: Oh My.
Doctor: Probably from rolling around in that Toxic waste. What in God’s name were you trying to prove?
Mayor: I was trying to gain super powers.
Doctor: Well that’s just silly.
Mayor: Silly yes … Idiotic … yes.!

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